Impotence. It’s undeniably a big deal among men and for women whose men have such condition. If you feel like impotent, you may somehow feel like you lost a huge part of your masculinity and dignity as a man yourself.
One manifestation of impotence is erectile difficulties. They come in many degrees and are often implication of a more serious problem. There are men who can easily have an erection but can only keep it for a short period of time. Others however become erect, but not totally rigid. There are also some who experience erectile difficulties whenever they have a new partner and more so challenge as having a long-time partner. There are those men of course who are not able to achieve erection at all.
This is just not the time to despair as there are definite solutions to help you improve your sex life. Here are some tips for you to restore your sexual health:
Eliminate performance demand.
Having multiple episodes of impotence is something not unusual among men. At some point, men experience impotence several times in their entire lifetime. A young and perfectly healthy man can be impotent due to anxiety caused by certain experiences such as not being able to perform well in bed after drinking alcohol or after a particularly stressful day at work. He can put too much emphasis on that particular incident and eventually fears that it may just happen again. In such case, it is highly recommended to intermittently abstain from intercourse. Instead, it is encouraged to engage in cuddling and some other non-sexual touch. The idea of removing the demand to perform is basically to make sex a less threatening experience for couples.
Break out the routine.
There are couples who, over the course of time, got so used to each other up to the point that they no longer try new things or at least they forget to do so. They go on to these monotonous routines and won’t put much novelty. Example of which is a couple who always have sex at midnight with the lights off and doing the exact same foreplay they do each night. Eventually, sex for both will relatively become invariant. As a solution, it’s best to vary the routines. Couples can change the time maybe doing it in the morning or high noon this time. They can also go to a different place such as going to a hotel. In short, it is recommended to always add spice and everything nice while in bed.
Express your feelings.
Among couples, relationship difficulties such as a simple misunderstanding are often notorious culprit to having sexual problems. Feelings such as anger, resentment and even petty hurt feelings can take a toll to a couple’s sex life and eventually turning the bedroom into a battlefield. This situation is most likely to develop among couples who lack communication. They must always verbalize their feelings and talk it out. As a caution, being vocal to one’s feelings should not be in terms of accusations and should not be assertive in any ways. It is better to focus in letting your partner know how you feel than merely focusing on the actions. Doing a thorough cleaning in a relationship instead of storing all sorts of emotional debris for a long time may just pave a way towards a healthier sexual relationship.
Know that it’s totally normal.
As mentioned earlier, men in general regardless of their age can experience impotence and that is totally normal. Having difficulties in achieving full and lasting erection does not mean that there is already something physiologically or psychologically wrong. A lot of men often think that what they feel is not normal. This mindset can only lead to a significant decline of self-esteem once they lost a certain extent of their masculinity. The real deal is even if you fail periodically, try not to get too hard on yourself. Getting too upset with the situation only causes performance anxiety. It’s important that one must acknowledge and understand the problem and do his best by simply trying over and over again.
Know helpful coping strategies.
The size of the penis, neither its rigidity is not always the measure of a man’s sexual prowess. Again, age is not the issue as to why men would feel impotent. There are couples who have been together for the longest time and yet consider themselves as maritally and sexually satisfied with their partners. This is despite the fact that there is already a decrease in frequency of sexual interactions. Couples who develop coping strategies and alternative ways to reach orgasm do bypass the threats of impotence.
Read and talk.
There are still many of us who barely have any idea or knowledge about impotence. While there are already a lot of resources, what we know about such problem is still very superficial especially the methods that can be tried to prevent it from worsening. What men only knew is that impotence is having difficulties in erection caused by aging and lower level of testosterone. Men should read proper materials that lead to self-discovery than using X-rated materials that are absolutely of no help.
One thing to keep in mind among men is the fact that while it is a top priority to please your partner, it is of equal importance to please yourself too. Here comes masturbation which is simply bringing yourself to orgasm alone. It may just be helpful reteaching yourself how to achieve your own pleasure for as long as you do not overdo it. The next step is of course to bring that stimulation while having sex with a partner. This greatly changes the focus from performance anxiety to a mutually pleasurable interaction.
Keeping yourself healthy at all cost makes sense to achieving a healthy sex life. What men should know is that impotence can also be caused by physical causes and such can make a man permanently impotent. Smoking causes blockages in penile arteries that obstruct the blood flow which is the most essential ingredient to achieve full erection. It is proven among studies that smoking have direct link to blockages in the arteries. Although quitting smoking will not totally reverse existing damage, it can definitely help prevent further worsening.
Don’t drink too much alcohol.
Drinking excessive amount of alcohol is yet another physical cause of impotence. If a man is under the influence of alcohol his sexual functioning is significantly impaired preventing him from being aroused and therefore won’t enable him to achieve erection. In other words, alcohol and sex, you just can’t mix them.
Talk about sex.
Now this can be an embarrassing area but this heavily contributes to the problem. Oftentimes, erectile difficulties are caused by not feeling aroused. In which case, it is highly recommended to be more open to communicate their sexual desires. It is important to know what you like in a sexual situation so you know how you can get more pleasure and stimulation out of it. It’s all about satisfying your sexual innuendos.
Seek professional help whenever necessary.
If you have already tried everything but to no avail, then it is necessary to seek professional help. There are already a lot of therapies that can help you improve your sex life. In this modern day, being a sex therapist is a profession.